Today we're pleased to announce an exciting new direction for our humble website -- very soon CNET UK will officially rebrand as Angry Birds UK, your number one portal to all things Angry Birds, including Angry Birds reviews, news, features and videos, as well as Angry Birds opinion, exclusive scoops and polls.
You spoke, and we listened. Traffic monitoring on the site shows Angry Birds coverage of any kind to be significantly more popular than our second most-read topic -- iPhone 6 conjecture. At the top of this story you can see a sneak preview of our new homepage as it will look very soon.
Intensive surveying of our readership confirmed our suspicion that an All Angry Birds, All The Time approach was the best way to communicate with a tech-savvy, pig-loathing audience. When queried on interests, pastimes and Web-browsing habits, over 90 per cent of you replied that if a sentence didn't contain the words 'Angry', 'Birds' or 'Mighty Eagle', you were over 60 per cent more likely to stop reading and start playing Angry Birds.
More than 25 per cent admitted that in a moment of solitude you'd tried flinging yourselves bodily into buildings "just to check". An estimated 6.5 billion of you didn't complete the survey, presumably because you were busy trying to three-star level 5-12.
The change in focus, which we hope will engage Angry Birds afficionados of all ages and creeds, is the culmination of months of hard work, programming and bird photography on behalf of our Editorial, Design and Bird Photography teams. It will see our increasingly irrelevant mobile phone, laptop and iPad categories discarded, and replaced with Angry Birds walkthroughs, Angry Birds papercraft and Angry Birds fanfiction (18+) respectively.
Our editorial staff look forward to the challenge of creating diverse, continuous Angry Birds content without going insane. News and features editor Rich Trenholm (newly promoted to Angry Birds cosplay editor) says, "The thought of writing even one more word about Angry Birds makes me wish I'd never been hatched."