Top ten evil computers

By Rich Trenholm on 01 November 2007, 10:12am

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Queeg 500
Red Dwarf: 'Queeg'

Evil quote: "You two suckers! Stop shirking and get working!"

Having been alone for three million years, Holly, the ship's computer aboard Jupiter Mining Company spaceship Red Dwarf, had gone a bit soft in the diodes. Computer senility had put a dent in his IQ of 6,000 (the same as 6,000 PE teachers). The crew, consisting of last human alive Lister, hologramatic git Rimmer, and super-evolved feline Cat, had enough. So Holly was replaced by the ship's backup computer, Queeg 500.

Super-efficient Queeg quickly gets things running smoothly, much to the delight of officious Rimmer. Unfortunately Queeg is a stickler for the regulations and is big on physical jerks, followed by dinners of pea on toast. The slovenly crewmembers quickly call for a return to Holly's regime of 'little understandings', but after a climactic chess challenge Holly is set to be erased.

Thankfully, it was only a joke! Holly, feeling underappreciated, created Queeg to show the boys from the Dwarf how good they had it. "We are talking jape of the decade..."

Evil rating: Mwahahahahaha!