Just one short year ago, we'd never heard of inexplicably popular, puberty-dodging, Lego-haired pop homunculus Justin Bieber. A year down the line, the Dairylea-faced irritant still doesn't have any body hair, but he does have Justbeats Solo: his own signature Monster Beats by Dr Dre headphones.
The Justbeats Solo headphones are over-ear cans available in white and purple, which is little Jussy's favourite colour. The tortuously named iBeats by Dr Dre Justbeats Edition are an in-ear version. The headphones come with a voice-activated remote control for hands-free chatting to BFFs when plugged into your iPhone.
According to the press release, "by putting on a pair of Justbeats by Dr Dre, Justin's fans will now hear the intricate details of a song, really feel the music and unlock its emotion, just the way he intended it". Yes, true Beliebers, you can now hear the intricate details interlaced in such lyrics as "For you, I would do whatever", and unlock the deep-rooted emotion imbued in such heartfelt couplets as "When I met you my heart went knock knock, now them butterflies in my stomach won't stop stop" and "I was, like, baby, baby, baby, oh, like, baby, baby, baby, oh, like, baby, baby, baby, oh".
We question why Monster has chosen to work with Bieber, as previously it's only worked with artists with titles: Dre, who certainly didn't spend seven years at hip-hop medical school to be called Mr Dre, and Lady Gaga. Bieber should be way back at the end of the Monster queue, behind Prince, Lady Sovereign and the Kings of Leon.
Monster also recently released rather snazzy Daft Punk headphones celebrating new film Tron: Legacy.
The over-ear Justbeats will cost fans of detail, emotion and heavily-autotuned pre-pubescent warbling a mere $170 (£110). The in-ear versions cost $120 (£75).

Comments 12
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Anonymous 14 December, 2010 18:48
lol it's PINK
Anonymous 14 December, 2010 20:43
You sir are a gentleman and a scholar, great and humerous read.
ukmikk 14 December, 2010 22:42
Indeed, your purile pre-adult writing style has found a perfect application in Bieber-bashing. Well done, 8/10 plus house points.
Naryan 15 December, 2010 07:54
That was fantastic, thanks for that little article, made my day :) From the heights of Eminem aaaall the way down to Beiber, what is he thinking...?
billfred 15 December, 2010 09:51
@ukmikk, get a life.
This piece of news gave me an embolism, happy now Bieber?! I'm dead.
Anonymous 15 December, 2010 17:26
this is the funniest thing I have read this afternoon.
anonymous 15 December, 2010 19:18
Is it wrong of me to not really care about the Bieber connection (since I can honestly say that I am not aware that I have actually heard a Bieber tune so far) and just like the fact they are a lovely lilac colour?!
ukmikk 15 December, 2010 22:32
@bill, wow, rapier-like. Congrats.
Anonymous 5 January, 2011 20:52
Its not PINK its PURPLE re u blind?? -.- theyre lovely be happy at lest these headphones exists tanx to JB & DR DRE ppl
Anonymous 13 March, 2011 15:48
How much does JustBeats Solo cost in Euros ?!
please answer
thanks :)
Anonymous 2 June, 2011 11:39
AAAAAAAAAAAARGGGGGHHHHHH!!!!!!! HIDE THE CHILDREN!!!!! GARISH, WHINY HEADPHONES WITH JUSTIN BIEBER'S FACE ON THEM! IT'S AN APOCALYPSE!!!!! WHERE ARE TOM MORELLO AND ZACK DE LA ROCHA HEADPHONES!
anonymous 8 February, 2012 11:23
To the comment below:
Are u color blind? They are PURPLE